Petite Movie Snob Guesses the Ratings of Upcoming Movies

I don't rely solely on critics' opinions of movies to decide whether or not they are worth my time, and neither should you. That said, if a movie receives a very low score on Rotten Tomatoes, it's unlikely that I'll find any good qualities about it. And, typically, I'll give relatively high ratings to films with similarly high scores on RT. I've decided to try something new and something fun: guessing whether upcoming movies will be "fresh" (60% or above) or "rotten" (below 60%). Let's see how I do! (FYI: these are only movies that don't yet have any ratings listed on RT).

March 30
-Dark Tide (PG-13) -- Halle Berry, Olivier Martinez, Ralph Brown -- rotten
-Mirror Mirror (PG) -- Julia Roberts, Lily Collins, Armie Hammer -- rotten
-Wrath of the Titans (PG-13) -- Sam Worthington, Gemma Arterton, Ralph Fiennes -- rotten

April 6
-American Reunion (R) -- Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan, Seann William Scott -- fresh (just barely)

April 12
-Lockout (PG-13) -- Guy Pearce, Maggie Grace, Peter Stormare -- rotten
-The Three Stooges (PG) -- Benicio Del Toro, Will Sasso, Sean Hayes -- rotten

April 20
-The Lucky One (PG-13) -- Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling, Blythe Danner -- rotten
-Chimpanzee (G) -- Documentary -- fresh

April 27
-Safe (R) -- Jason Statham, Catherine Chan, Chris Sarandon -- rotten
-Pirates! Band of Misfits (PG) -- [voices of] Hugh Grant, Brendan Gleeson, Martin Freeman -- fresh

May 4
-The Avengers (PG-13) -- Robert Downey, Jr., Chris Hemsworth, Chris Evans -- fresh

May 11
-Dark Shadows (Unrated) -- Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Helena Bonham Carter -- fresh (barely)
-What to Expect When You're Expecting (Unrated) -- Elizabeth Banks, Jennifer Lopez, Cameron Diaz -- rotten

May 18
-Battleship (Unrated) -- Taylor Kitsch, Liam Neeson, Rihanna -- rotten
-Hysteria (R) -- Maggie Gyllenhaal, Hugh Dancy, Rupert Evertt -- fresh

May 25
-Men in Black III (Unrated) -- Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin -- rotten

Comments

Review: Wind River (2017)

Elisabeth Olsen and Jeremy Renner Director/Screenwriter: Taylor Sheridan Starring: Jeremy Renner, Elisabeth Olsen, Gil Birmingham, Graham Greene, Kelsey Asbille MPAA Rating: Rated R for strong violence, a rape, disturbing images, and language Genres: Drama, Mystery & Suspense Theatrical Release Date: August 4, 2017 On DVD/Streaming: November 14, 2017 Rotten Tomatoes Score : 87% Clip: "She Ran Further" Wind River is not an easy watch, to say the least. But it's almost essential viewing; it shows us [the audience] a part of the country with which we may have previously been unfamiliar. I, for one, knew little to nothing about Native American life in Wyoming. The brisk, brutal, snowy landscape easily matches the tone of the story and the mystery at its center. From the opening sequence, which shows a distraught young woman running barefoot on the cold snow, we have an idea as to where the story will take us. And, for the m...

Review: Tomb Raider

Daniel Wu and Alicia Vikander Director: Roar Uthaug Screenwriters: Geneva Robertson-Dworet, Alastair Siddons Starring: Alicia Vikander, Walton Goggins, Dominic West, Daniel Wu, Kristin Scott Thomas MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for sequences of violence and action, and some language Genres: Action, Adventure Theatrical Release Date: March 16, 2018 Rotten Tomatoes Score : 50% Clip: "Waterfall" Tomb Raider is much better than it has any reason to be. Not that it needed to be bad, but with the plethora of remakes and reboots as of late, it is easy to have low expectations for the majority of them. Director Roar Uthaug's Tomb Raider is definitely more of a reboot than a remake, as it is a far cry from the poorly-made Angelina Jolie-starring Lara Croft movies (of which there are two). Jolie's Croft was certainly slick, but the focus seemed to be more on her sex appeal than anything else. Tom Raider , however, Is more about Croft’s br...

Review: Love, Simon

Nick Robinson and Katherine Langford Director: Greg Berlanti Screenwriters: Elizabeth Berger and Isaac Aptaker (based on the novel by Becky Albertalli) Starring: Nick Robinson, Jennifer Garner, Josh Duhamel, Katherine Langford, Alexandra Shipp MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for thematic elements, sexual references, language, and teen partying Genres: Comedy, Drama, Romance Theatrical Release Date: March 16, 2018 Rotten Tomatoes Score : 92% Clip: "Why Is Straight the Default?" Love, Simon is a coming-of-age rom-com tailor-made for 21st-century teenagers. And it just so happens that it's the first one that features a gay lead. Based on the best-selling YA adult by Becky Albertalli, Simon directed by Greg Berlanti, who spearheads CW shows such as Arrow and The Flash , and written by This Is Us scribes Elizabeth Berger and Isaac Aptaker. Berlanti, Berger, and Aptaker bring numerous pop culture and political references, which certainly helps to a...

Movies of a Petite Aspie

Search This Blog